"A child needs to know they are loved. But it's important they also know self-love"
A very different view on self -esteem!
Self esteem, in general, is not complex or complicated. It's simple and straightforward. In doing research into self esteem I realised it has become very over complicated and confusing. Could that be why 85% of the worlds population suffer from low self- esteem? That's 85% of the world population not feeling good about themselves!
Self esteem means how you feel about being you. Nothing more nothing less.
Positive self-esteem means loving being yourself no matter what.
No person, situation or place could change that inner power.
Your life experiences will ALWAYS reflect how you feel about being you. So the goal must be to always feel good within, right?
During chidhood, children need help and support in holding onto that in-built feeling of self love. (I truly believe it is something we are already born with). The emphasis is on the word FEELING. Teaching a child how to hold onto the feeling of self-love is the essential missing piece. This is Teeno and Co's mission.
It's all well and good telling a child how much they are loved. But this is simply not enough. How much time is spent showing the child how to self-love?
Why is self-love essential?
Let's take a child who is being bullied for example let's call her 'Sami'.
Sami is being bullied at school, the other children call her 'ugly'. She knows she is loved by her family, they tell her everyday. But knowing this alone does not help sheild her young growing mind from the consistent, hurtful, comments she experiences while she's outside that family circle of love.
If, on the other hand, she knows she is loved and she is also taught consistently how to love herself, she could not take these comments as truth and internalise them into low self-esteem.
This is extremely powerful because it's not the words which cause the damage, it's the recipients reactions to the words which render them damaging or not. Do they believe the mean words have some truth or not? The more self-love you have, the less value you will give to others opinion. Simple.
I hope I have explained myself well enough here. I do like to get straight to the point! The ultimate goal is preserving children's self esteem by making it simple and fun for them to understand.
NOW HERE ARE TWO SUPER POWERFUL TIPS YOU CAN USE TO START RAISING A CHILD'S SELF LOVE IMMEDIATELY!
1. ENCOURAGE SELF PRAISE: If a child shows you something they have accomplished, praise their efforts then add self-praise suggestion "I think that's a really great picture, Jabari. Do you think it's great too?" This is subtle but very powerful, you are teaching them that their thoughts and feelings about themselves are important too.
2. INTRODUCE POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS: Affirmations are words we constantly think and say to ourselves which, in turn, reflect in our lives. A very powerful one is, "I LOVE BEING ME!" which can be found in our kids self-esteem tool kit. A positive affirmation will sink into the subconcious mind making it the 'theme' of a child's life and they will begin to live and experience the essence of the affirmation.
Children's early self-esteem skills are very important if you want them them to grow up with a positive mind-set. This is best done between the ages of 3 to 7 when children's brains are developing self concept ideas. You can feel rest assured that when they are not physically with you, there is a protective power you have instilled in them that can never be taken away...SELF-LOVE!
Sophia McGhie is a mother of a 4 year old and founder of Teeno and Co. She has over 20 years experience as a qualified Early Years Professional. And has used her knowledge and skills to create Teeno and Co. T&C empower children with Self-esteem skills by making it simple and fun for them and their families! Find out more... www.teenoandco.com